Where now the mango?

I don't know how many university students are exposed to Old English, even in the English department, but some of them must be with me in thinking it weird that people ever talked that way. Recitations are one thing, but actual conversations just don't seem to fit with what I've heard so far. For example, this line from The Wanderer:

"Hwǣr cwōm mearg? Hwǣr cwōm mago?     Hwǣr cwōm māþþumgyfa?" 

It roughly means "Where now the horse? Where now the rider? Where now the hoard-sharer/ring-giver/giver of treasure?" and is pronounced with scottishy vowels and a lot of rolling Rs. Allow me to indulge for a minute in imagining a conversation...

"Hrrrrothbob, thou goat! Wherrre now the horrrse?"
"I could do nothing, my fatherrr. It was taken by a scylding-thief underrr the helm of night."
"Well then, wherrre now the rrrider?"
"Overrr the land-bump, forrrsooth."
"Eala! How that the horrrse has passed away! How that the steed-trrreasure has vanished, as if it had neverrr been."

 Awesome, right? But awesomer still is a thing called "cognitive hooks," which in this context seems to mean "changing Old English phrases to similar sounding Modern English phrases." This concept resulted in our class interpreting the quoted line as "Where comes mare? Where comes mango? Where comes math and gouda?"

Between Old English and Japanese, this should be an interesting semester. (I've already been thinking about forming a group in Japanese 101 called "the Knights who say に")

Hajimemashite, Surname First Name

The first day of the semester always defies expectation. Creative writing looked interesting and stimulating in the golden olden days of registration, but the requisite anthology of Canadian poetry turned out to be depressingly avant-garde. Japanese 101, in contrast, sparked my attention even during the doldrum hours that usually begin after 6:00 pm. It is a credit-filler course for me, chosen only after it was clear that Russian, Spanish and German were at impossible times, but even so...

On the long walk back to my vehicle, I said "Hajimemashite, Surname First Name. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu" over and over. I am still hazy on whether or not my own name is supposed to go after Hajimemamgawehgetcetera or not. Perhaps it is supposed to be the name of the person I am addressing? The professor is a nice lady who explained that kanji tattoos are risky. She said a certain symbol for 'peace'  can mean 'cheap,' too. "It makes me laugh," she said. "Some people think Japanese people always go like this," she added, and steepled her hands. "Not true!"

Happy New Year, Said The Poem

Listen to me. 
A bad night's sleep and a sky the colour of tombstones,
and the monotony of the morning, the now, the chill rain and the dull day,
and the crushing fear of the future
must seem pressing -

but look, have you ever seen a man paddling so happy in such
an abundance of wet?
How do the ducks do it?
The rain and the run-off rise underneath that Mallard,
and he bobs on the swell and thinks
How grand is my private canal!

This is a neat chap capped with a glorious green.
(let the rain slash if it likes!)
The cold wind is skimming
the brown-brimming channel,
but the unsinkable duck is quacking and swimming,
and the scowling sky thins,
and cracks,
and grins.

Hercules couldn't lift the spirit, but a duck in a ditch is a fine thing.

(90% of this poem is written by me. I borrowed the phrase "Hercules couldn't lift the spirit" because it was a title prompt for a contest on the site AllPoetry. And I just wanted to write a poem about a duck for a contest.)